You know when bands have tour buses? Yeah, we have mega bus. I'm not going to complain about the prices, they're great. I will complain about these two girls sitting in front of me. I have no idea who they are but I'm going to breakdown my assumptions about them judging from the conversation I can't help but overhear:
One of them is named Rachel. She has recently fallen in love with art. I assume this because Van Gogh is her "favorite artist of like all time. Omgah!" All I have is hatred for her. Her laugh sounds like a seal blowing a whale dick while getting its salad tossed. Can't imagine it? Google it. Wait, no. Google image it. Sweet right? Absolutely not.
Oh look! Rachel has just become aware that the entire bus hates her so she brings her apelike volume to an apelike whisper. Don't you hate when people whisper so loud it makes it pointless? Plus she sounds like a pedophile at a baptism.
Her friend dwarfs her in crudeness. I think this girl's name is Britney or Shitney. I'll go with Shitney of course. First off, I was under the impression that girls care about the way they smell. Bath and Bodyworks is an entire store dedicated to not smelling like shit, but Shitney over here must have passed that store up at the mall. Instead, she went straight to Hot Topic and just absorbed all of that sweaty, bile inducing, teenage body odor. She smells like a penis. Straight up balls and penis.
It's her pits. I can't see them but I know she has a colony of armpit lice that love it there. Its like fucking palm springs under her arms, miserable. Fucking gross. At least the lice will never go thirsty, plenty of sweat there. She needs to leave.
Remember the bus accidents happening not too long ago? Well...I won't go that far.
Anyway, looking forward to Philadelphia.
One of them is named Rachel. She has recently fallen in love with art. I assume this because Van Gogh is her "favorite artist of like all time. Omgah!" All I have is hatred for her. Her laugh sounds like a seal blowing a whale dick while getting its salad tossed. Can't imagine it? Google it. Wait, no. Google image it. Sweet right? Absolutely not.
Oh look! Rachel has just become aware that the entire bus hates her so she brings her apelike volume to an apelike whisper. Don't you hate when people whisper so loud it makes it pointless? Plus she sounds like a pedophile at a baptism.
Her friend dwarfs her in crudeness. I think this girl's name is Britney or Shitney. I'll go with Shitney of course. First off, I was under the impression that girls care about the way they smell. Bath and Bodyworks is an entire store dedicated to not smelling like shit, but Shitney over here must have passed that store up at the mall. Instead, she went straight to Hot Topic and just absorbed all of that sweaty, bile inducing, teenage body odor. She smells like a penis. Straight up balls and penis.
It's her pits. I can't see them but I know she has a colony of armpit lice that love it there. Its like fucking palm springs under her arms, miserable. Fucking gross. At least the lice will never go thirsty, plenty of sweat there. She needs to leave.
Remember the bus accidents happening not too long ago? Well...I won't go that far.
Anyway, looking forward to Philadelphia.
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